August 1, 1944

The complete blanket of apathy has settled over the camp — nothing inspires thought, emotions or actions. Would that some good news would come to us to revive falling spirits and low morale. Of those three great virtues faith, hope, charity, only one remains in most of us and that one is hope. When, and if, we lose that we will indeed be in a hell. I strive day by day to keep from losing any of those three, fighting against any recession for I know that they are all-important in maintaining something more than an animal existence — to what degree I succeed will be manifested in both character and spirit when again we are free. More eye trouble with an increase in leg and foot trouble make things worse than they otherwise would be. That, coupled with the news that all “duty administrative officer leaders” will be relieved makes it even worse — I hope said news will prove to be nothing but rumor, but some small feeling of hopelessness makes me believe that the worst will happen. I am thinking of seeing if my present physical status will warrant my being marked “Qtrs”. I do not know yet just what I shall do about it. Our garden produce has fallen off — today we transplanted a lot of okra but the sun immediately came out for the first time in two weeks — I fear we shall lose them. No matter where one goes these days conversation lags and so I go to bed early and sleep as mech as I can. This job is about the limit of what I can stand these days — how i hope to be able to hang on. The future is really uncertain considering that we are prisoners — one would normally think a prisoner’s life cut and dried but no future but time. Such isn’t the case here — another Japan detail currently hangs over our heads and that, with likely moves intra-camp, seems to make everything “in the air.” What will come will come, however.